Finally some science to support what we already know: women lie beter than men. In support of writing a book, "Little White Lies, Deep Dark Secrets: The Truth About Why Women Lie" Susan Shapiro Barash interviewed 500 and came to the conclusion that women lie "more cleverly and successfully than men"...but for good reason..."Women lie as a survival technique, but also to get what they want," said Barash. Well maybe not for good reason... sounds like for any reason.
All this lying is coming to the spotlight because of the Fox television show "Moment of Truth". It is a gross show that hurts people and appeals to our wicked hearts (like Jerry Springer). There is an article in the NY Post about, you can read it here.
What do you think? One additional question...are women better liars OR are men more trusting?
CC
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6 comments:
Great post. Here is the distinction... women know what to say and how to say it so it doesn't come across as a lie and it isn't revealed as a lie unless a man gives deep thought about every single word in the sentence that contains the lie. Call it a white lie or lying by submission. Whatever it is, men do not have the time or the mental capacity to realize what is being said to them.
On the other hand, men try to hide instead of lie. This gets as far as the next conversation with their wives, who can tell almost immediately that something is up - even if the lie is not a part of the conversation - and knows techniques that only those who work for the KGB and the CIA has knowledge of to force the husband to confess their wrong doings.
lying by omission - not submission (though in a way I guess there is a little truth in the use of the submission word too!)
Ouch. Josh is dead on. And I'm guilty. Chris calls them "word games." I don't know if men are more trusting... but I definitely acknowledge (even in our girl children/boy children)... girls are the ones with more tendency to lie.
But WHY are girls better? Does it really have to do with some survival technique given to them by God? Does anyone have a chapter and verse for that?
And I agree, men are horrible at lying and generally decide it isn't worth the time or energy to even try. Women are probably so good at noticing when men lie because they are so good at lying. They can spot a lie a mile away because they themselves have already conceived the lie from every possible angle.
I find when me and my girl talk, I have to act like an attorney because I know that she is an expert liar/word-game player. It can be very stressful on a relationship...
Before we need to ask why they are better, we need to ask "is this a factual statement?" We both have real life examples and now a study, but does that prove it to be true?
And if it is true, could it be a generational trait and not necessarily a DNA trait? We have seen a drastic change in the family structure, media, schools and so on the past 30 years. Perhaps these techniques come from learning to survive as a single mom or how to climb the ladder of success in a male dominated world - issues not really discussed during biblical times.
Both by our personal observations and this study, I think we have established that it is a fact. I am normally on the nurture side of the nature vs nurture arguement, but it seems engrained in all women, but used in various amounts depending on the women (and how bad she wants something). On the other hand, girls look up to the main role model in their life (mommy/grandma) and learn from them... not sure about this.
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